....and saved by the bell for lunch.

Swiish!....missed!...
Swooosh!....missed!
Swackkkkk!!!...missed again!

....and then Sooot!, Sooooot!, Soooooot!.....and aiyoyo!...it hurts!!!!!

Ever the artful dodger, I was able to evade mum's caning swings 50% of the time. I'm proud of that record. I was always the "mua hu" (an eel) - in his territory. I knew my place around the house well, and I knew the places I could scramble to, for I had made "studies" of strategic and safe hiding locations.

In no time I was, however, crouching petrified under the marble top dining table protected by the four metal legs that supported it. Twing!..twang!.. and twong!, twong! twong!!.... all misses, scary sounds of mum's rotan cane against the metal legs of the table. Nothing hit me. Gosh, great place to be on days like this. Good choice.

"Come out!", mum bellowed.

That would be foolish, suicidal perhaps, I thought. She stopped to catch her breathe and hanged on for a while.

Mum's a diminutive woman, just 5 feet tall but really, a tough woman. A no-nonsense disciplinarian. She is quite adept with the cane - what more can be said if I had 4 siblings before me. I think she can even be a drum majorette in a marching band, using her cane alone!...if she wants to.

An excellent cook, the sous chef of the house; I love her dearly and the food she cooks. But not some type of dishes I hate and is forced to "eat" like, in fujian lingo - "cheak tin nah" and "cheak tua pan". Literally translated it's "eat rotan" and "eat broad noodles". Those dishes, I really abhor. It means to get "WHACKED!"

....and like a high-pitched battle cry in a chinese movie between a winning swords-woman and her chickened-out "hiding somewhere" adversary, she hollered yet again, "COME OUT!...I won't say this again!"

Then suddenly I heard a cool voice. Yes, a cool, cool voice that came from down-to-earth dad who's back home for lunch. ...and I'm down and under his lunch table!

"What's all this about, what are you doing?", dad queried mum & I.

"Nothing", said I.

"What nothing! You see you son lah!!.....Today is his first day in school. I walked him to school, and when I reach his school to walk him back just now, he's already home!", mum complained.

"He could have been hit by any vehicle!"

"He could have been hit dead by any vehicle!" just to emphasise her point.

And Tua-kor was sitting there on her stool, amused at my "eating broad noodles" again. But I'm under the table, bemused by mental visuals of crying faces when grandma went off to "sell salted duck eggs".. Man, that would be dreadful and traumatic for everyone. Me, dead?.......and as if the "sunlight soap" episode in school earlier that day wasn't enough.

Mum cooled down a bit and lowered her cane, as my hero; my dad the great philosopher turned to her to say a few words. And he didn't minced it.

"When you promised a time you must keep the time".

Yes, I would have been a nut-case if mum never came and I waited till I turn to stone by sunset.

" But since he can walk home safely, you can use that time for other household chores".

Great, the level of difficulty of walking by the road-side from Steward Lane to Pitt Street, Armenian Street, Lumut Lane and passing through a backlane lined by bucket system latrines to reach home is no big deal. I just had to make a handful of road crosses. And I could stop by for some nectar sucking session from the flower hedges of the Penang Youth Center. Maybe indulge in some fun at the swings and see-saws at the playground before hitting home.

"Can you do it from tomorrow?" dad asked.

"Yes, I can", the always "can" boy answered.

"Is lunch ready?"....asked dad, and yes came the answer. Lunch is soon on the table. So off I go scott-free, but only for a while as mum still need to have the last word.

"Ah Seng, go eat your lunch with your dad. You're just lucky!" ....more swish, swashbuckling swordsplaying sessions yet to come?

Mum became free of this humdrum tag-with-me routine, and a couple of years later I overheard her saying to dad, "See, Bah Kow (blur dog) still has to pick his son home from school after 2 years!" Little wonder he's nick-named Blur dog, how apt.

Those experiences created a lot of resolve in me to be independent, and never to be late for appointments from a very young age, all thanks to mum & dad!